A bad vibe
This kind of gave me a weird vibe. I started out a bit cheeky and goofy, but his temperament was not typical of a young college student. It felt weird. I don't know what I think of this. I probably won't go through with it, something tells me not to.
I posted most of the conversation in full; it might be a lot of reading but I didn't know what to cut out of it. He talks very strangely. Weird.
QuickFiveHundred: are you an escort?
Me: yes
Me: how did you get my screenname?
QuickFiveHundred: [escort website]
Me: ok
Me: i'm resisting the impulse to say "here's your sign"
Me: if you know what i mean
QuickFiveHundred: youre a funny one
Me: well..
Me: why else would i be on [escort website]?
QuickFiveHundred: you dont make money with your jokes now do you?
Me: eh
QuickFiveHundred: im just messing with you
QuickFiveHundred: im curious as to why you chose your current profession
Me: same reason i eat babies
Me: for fun and profit!
(ridiculous but irrelevant interlude ensues)
QuickFiveHundred: i am not approaching you with the intention of using your services myself though
Me: are you a graduate student implanting nodes on people's brains?
Me: and writing your thesis on random people you meet on the internet?
Me: or are you a journalist looking for the hooker with a heart of gold?
Me: or are you the pigs running a sting in their vice squad?
QuickFiveHundred: im a student at community college for that matter
Me: or just a lonely guy, wasting away in your room, playing WoW and chatting with escorts because you've downloaded all the possible porn you can and need to get off somehow?
Me: student at the community college, i see
Me: did you grow up in town?
QuickFiveHundred: no, im not lonely.
QuickFiveHundred: yes i did
QuickFiveHundred: is your fantastic wit included in your business services, or am i being treated to it for free?
Me: i can picture it now, poor kid worked nights to support his family and got D's in school, forced to attend community college with high hopes of transferring, if only his baby mama will get off his back
Me: you think my wit is fantastic?
Me: that's awesome
QuickFiveHundred: nothing less
QuickFiveHundred: maybe youre just drunk
Me: what if i am?
Me: what if i'm not?
Me: how do you have any way of knowing?
QuickFiveHundred: very profound
Me: whether i am just a crazy student amped on knowledge who stays up lates pondering the beauty of the equation of energy equalling fast mass
Me: or if i am a drunk whore who went down to the closest shady bar to escape the misery of her life, the boyfriend who cheats on her, her parents who have shunned her, and is now forced to chug 16 ozs of beer in order to impress townies?
Me: or if i am a drunk sorority girl with a wild imagination who would like to be a writer but doesn't see any use for it and instead must find outlets in other places?
Me: or if i am completely sober, have had an entire six pack of Water Joe, eight s'mores made with a bunsen burner, and am answering questions on schrodinger on the internet while talking to someone random who is not going to pay me and who doesn't realize this conversation is all being recorded and sent to others for amusement?
Me: HOW WILL YOU EVER KNOW
QuickFiveHundred: i hate to interrupt you miss caroline, for you are extremely entertaining. i would certainly enjoy conversing with you further, however, i do have an offer to extend to you if you are at all interested
Me: interesting
Me: i am curious what this offer entails
QuickFiveHundred: tell me about your typical weekly schedule
Me: why?
QuickFiveHundred: being a (..) student is no doubt very stressful
Me: well, i wake up at about 4pm, consume two large pizzas topped with marshmallows, then sit in front of the tv wondering what the hell i am going to do with a science degree, and then i start my homework at about 2 am until i collapse in the piles of dirty clothing that tower in my room scattered with dirty bowls
Me: what is your week like?
QuickFiveHundred: there is one week next month during which i would like to secure your services, perhaps for 3 nights at most
QuickFiveHundred: try to focus here
Me: i thought you said you were not interested
Me: and instead were just chatting for reasons that were never disclosed
QuickFiveHundred: not for myself, but for a client
Me: is he hot?
QuickFiveHundred: i am to arrange for his companionship, while he is in town
QuickFiveHundred: i doubt that you screen your potential clients based on appearances
Me: you doubt?
QuickFiveHundred: very much so
Me: interesting
Me: you would be wrong
Me: physical chemistry is important
QuickFiveHundred: so you enjoy your job in itself, and not just for the money
Me: correct
Me: i screen
QuickFiveHundred: as far as i am aware, you are the youngest escort in the area
Me: that's why i have the luxury
QuickFiveHundred: i can assure you that your time will be exceedingly compensated
Me: interesting
Me: details
QuickFiveHundred: but
QuickFiveHundred: i have a task at hand, rather pressing
QuickFiveHundred: if you would not be interested yourself, any help you can extend would be appreciated
QuickFiveHundred: i am far from familiar with this type of scene
QuickFiveHundred: i realize that you are not the typical escort, and this is all the better for the position
QuickFiveHundred: just tell me what accomodations you should require for such an arrangement and i will see to them myself
Me: what?
Me: give it to me straight
QuickFiveHundred: what would you like to know
Me: what arrangement
QuickFiveHundred: three nights during one week, next month
QuickFiveHundred: maybe a few hours
Me: three full overnights?
QuickFiveHundred: i cant be certain
QuickFiveHundred: i would imagine a night on the town if you would be willing
QuickFiveHundred: nothing spectacular
Me: well i would need details
(various rules and requirements and expectations explained)
Me: what sort of client is this?
Me: i thought you were a community college student
Me: but you have clients?
QuickFiveHundred: i am a student, though it is not my main occupation
QuickFiveHundred: i cannot disclose any information as to the nature of the business
Me: you don't talk like a student
QuickFiveHundred: and how exaclty does a student speak/
Me: i don't know but it's giving me a bad vibe
QuickFiveHundred: very amusing
QuickFiveHundred: and the way you have spoken to me? i shouldnt let your habit of eating babies affect my judgement of you though
QuickFiveHundred: i understand your concern
QuickFiveHundred: and i need your help
QuickFiveHundred: i will do everything i can to make you feel more comfortable
QuickFiveHundred: there are just certain things i can and cannot do
QuickFiveHundred: i can meet you myself and it would not be hard to prove to you that i am a student as i say
QuickFiveHundred: but i cannot arrange for a meeting with my client until next month
Me: when next month?
Me: i've got a summer internship that isn't in town
QuickFiveHundred: the second weekend of may
Me: ok i will probably be here
Me: my last final is saturday may 14
QuickFiveHundred: what is your name
Me: why
QuickFiveHundred: or that which you should like to be called
Me: caroline
QuickFiveHundred: very well caroline
QuickFiveHundred: do you have a boyfriend?
Me: why
QuickFiveHundred: i do not want you to be uncomfortable about any aspect of such an arrangement
Me: i don't see why my personal life is any of your business
QuickFiveHundred: you may be somewhat reluctant, and i am sure you havent been doing this very long
QuickFiveHundred: fair enough
QuickFiveHundred: ill be in contact with you
posted by :) @ 1:43 AM
13 Comments:
this guy seems like an asshole, first of all. why give him the time of day? second, what's with all this cryptic "i can't disclose the identity of my client" shit? forget about it. this guy is an idiot and you'll get another client soon enough. no need to accept the unacceptable.
Hmm, I find him and his proposal a bit shady. If he can't disclose to you the nature of his business, it must be illegal; maybe even more so than yours. Also I agree with you that he doesn't sound like a typical college student. When an escort screen a client, she is the one asking questions about him and not the other way around. So far, he asked you lot of questions but he told you nothing in return. Go with your instinct and skip this one. You're in the "hobby" for the fun then money, not to meet some mysterious stranger who may complicate your life if things go wrong. Take care and be careful!
Cripes ! He wants to blackmail you to support himself through school. "QuickFiveHundred", so contemptuous. Maybe he fantasizes about beating up escorts for their low morals. I hate all his understatements. Danger all over it. But then, curiosity... Be careful.
I love your blog.
Jehanne
He sounded way to formal and creepy, like a pseudo-intellectual or a guy trying to be very polite and proper to you. And didn't talk to you straight about exactly what he (or his "client", whoever that is) wanted. I wouldn't deal with a middle man. Plus it's no matter *why* you chose to be an escort, or whether you had a b/f. You just go with what you are comfortable with.
follow you gut instincts
that guy seems majorly shady. from what i read on here you have no prob getting clients, why even deal with this kind of prick? furthermore, as a psych grad student I think it's somewhat concerning how he is really trying to maximize the power differential with him being completely dominant and dismissive of you. that unnerves me, and he's setting an unfriendly/scary tone. especially since your humor actually was brilliant.
My suggestion would be to block his IM's and ignore him. The probability of his request being legit is way lower than the probability of him being either bored and full of it, or worse setting you up for something bad.
perhaps this guy's in the adult film industry, or trying to get into at least, and wants to film the encounter, and he's bringing in some actor from out of town to be his main banger, and hasn't really set up any of the girls, so he can't quite say for sure what's going on....
or he's just really wierd and you should tell him to put on a short skirt and fuck-me boots and be his own damn escort...
The problem is that I'm just so damn curious what this guy wants. I think I'm going to ask him to take me out to dinner so we can discuss it, and then not take him up on the offer.
By the way, thanks for telling me my humor was brilliant! I was getting worried that I was only funny to myself and thus I was insane. Now I'm no longer worried and instead am full of myself.
And I agree that his stupid screenname is contemptuous. I thought it was really interesting that the psych grad student noticed the power dynamics in the conversation, because he did seem very dismissive.
I kept demanding details and he never supplied any!
We'll see what happens. Curiosity might kill me but I can't help myself. I'm generally very nosy and can't stand not knowing something. Aahh!
Also, do people set up porn films without a female lead? It seems to me like that would be the most important thing to find.
Ahh... didn't know you were concerned about your sense of humor. Here is another affirmation; yes, you're a funny gal and have a funny perspective on life too and that's why I read your blog diligently. :) Not that I've seen any but I would think gay porn films can do a movie without a female lead! Females aren't that important in those type of films. Haha!! :P
He sounds scary, but your comments make you sound like you're either on drugs and/or not too bright... so maybe he started sounding more and more detached (which is the scary part) because he wasn't sure how to respond to you.
Good luck with meeting him, and take more precautions than you normally would. This smells really bad to me. I would not rule out kidnapping as a possibility, given the stressing of multiple days (so you'll tell anyone you know that you're going to be busy for a while) and the "night out on the town" (step into my car).
'Course, I could just be paranoid (it's been a stressful coupla weeks)...
his tone sounds like a character from 'eyes wide shut' ... perhaps you could have ended up being surrounded by hundreds of naked aristocrats in red robes?
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